FA CUP 3rd ROUND. SATURDAY, 11th JANUARY 2025.

From Queen Street to the King’s Road: a brush with soccer Royalty.

Morecambe fans abandoned familiar Queen Street and the Barbary Coast with its Vape shops and greasy takeaways for the trendy and fashionable King’s Road, Chelsea in the very posh Borough of Kensington this afternoon.

It was almost exactly four years ago – 10^th January, 2021 – that Morecambe met Chelsea FC for the only previous time ever. Just as today, it was in the Third Round of the FA Cup. Just as today, it was played at Stamford Bridge. Then, though, Covid 19 ruled the world and the stadium was devoid of any spectators to the Londoners’ relatively straightforward win by four goals to nil.

Let’s look at the two teams who contested this fixture on the day:

Chelsea: Kepa Arrizabalaga; Antonio Rüdiger; Kurt Zouma (Fikayo Atomori); Emerson; César Azpilicueta; Billy Gilmour; Mason Mount (Tammy Abraham); Kai Havertz; Timo Werner (Olivier Giroud); Callum Hudson-Odoi (Faustino Anjorin); Hakim Ziyech (Christian Pulisic).

Subs not used: Mateo Kovacic; Wilfredo Caballero; Ben Chilwell; Jorginho.

Here we had the Great and the Good of the European game, led by a seemingly up-and-coming-Super Manager in the shape of former England midfielder and firm Chelsea favourite Frank Lampard. His team didn’t come cheap: the current Coventry boss spent £80 million on Havertz alone; £53m on Werner; £50.2 m on Chilwell and the total worth of his squad has been estimated at about three hundred million pounds.

For Morecambe, influential and inspirational Skipper Sam Lavelle was unable to play because of injury. So this is how Derek Adams’ side lined-up on the day:

Morecambe: Mark Halstead; Nathaniel Knight-Percival; Harry Davis; Stephen Hendrie (Liam Gibson); Ryan Cooney (Kelvin Mellor); Adam Phillips; Yann Songo’o; Aaron Wildig; Cole Stockton (Liam McAlinden); Carlos Mendes-Gomes (Brad Lyons); Jordan Slew (John O’Sullivan).

Subs not used: Jake Turner; Toumani Diagouraga; Alex Kenyon; A-Jay Leitch-Smith.

The total worth of this team, by contrast, has been estimated at about seventeen shillings and sixpence. I jest. OK – forty quid then…

Turn the clock forward four years and Chelsea’s squad is now worth almost one and a half billion pounds – almost as much as all the other Premiership squads put together according to some sources I personally think can’t count. Whatever the amount, it is ridiculous. Whilst RNLI men and women risk their lives to save others for no financial reward at all and NHS personnel save countless others for a fraction of what even average Premiership players are paid, these artificially created Superstars are able to attract wages which are simply not justifiable.

By contrast, Morecambe’s current squad of National League North rejects, journeymen and loanees – devoid now of such obvious talents as Wildig; Stockton; Diagouraga and Mendes-Gomes – is certainly worth just a fraction of the 2021 side. Add to that the fact that the team which lost during 2021 was on its way to League One at the end of the season and the current side seem to be heading towards the National League, any hopes that King Derek might have of causing any sort of upset against the obscenely rich men in the blue kit were the extreme imaginings of utter fantasy. By rights – or at least price-tags – Enzo Maresca’s men should run-up a cricket score this afternoon. The new Italian Chelsea coach had the following to say about the minnows from the north prior to the game:

“Chi sono queste persone? (Who are these people?) Cos’è la Lega Due? (What is League Two?) Avete parlato con il mio agente? (Have you spoken to my agent?)  Il mio compenso per questo tipo di interviste è enorme! (My fee for these sort of interviews is massive!”)

For Morecambe, Derek Adams was as up-beat as ever, even when reminded of the vast sums his opponents have spent just this season alone (about £185,000,000). We need to remember that Derek – in all his years of managing at Ross County; Plymouth Argyle and Morecambe – has yet to clock-up one hundred thousand pounds in transfer fees, given the severe financial restraints he has been under at each and every one of these clubs. (To give yet another perspective on this disparity between the royalty of Premier League clubs and the rest; the King of Morecambe’s total expenditure over this time would not even cover some Premiership player’s weekly pay.) He said:

“Just give me a hundred thousand please – it would help. I’m not asking for a million. I’m not asking for ten million The gap between the Premier League and League Two is enormous; we all know that.”

Asked his opinion of the impossibility these days of drawing the game and taking Chelsea back to north Lancashire for a replay, he answered:

“Unfortunately, that has been taken away from the lower division teams this season. I don’t think it’s right: I think we should be looking to have that (back). We want to try to generate as much money for our own club but the rules are the rules.“

As far as the game itself is concerned, he added – presumably with his tongue firmly in his cheek:

“I haven’t decided yet if I’m going to rotate my squad – just the same as Enzo might do with his squad. We (will) give them all the possession they want. We then have to close the space. It’s the space and the runners that will enable the opposition to get the upper hand. Having the ball is one thing but using the ball is another thing. So we need to negate the space. At times, we will get the ball back. It’s how good we are when we get it back; how many runners we can get forward – and take it from here. If you go all-out attack, you will be picked-off – there is no doubt about it. We need to have a game plan as we did when we went to Chelsea the last time to stop them finding their passes through. Ironically, it’s my second time managing at Stamford Bridge in the FA Cup Third Round – it’s his first time.”

Finally, he said – as far as the finances are concerned:

“I think it’s close to being a sell-out now. Financially, it’s great for us. We will probably take three hundred and fifty thousand (pounds). That’s a significant figure.”

For a more or less neutral opinion, we can now turn to BBC pundit Chris Sutton.

He predicted a 6-1 win for Chelsea but added:

“Morecambe are struggling at the bottom of League Two now, but I remember getting humbled 3-1 by them once, when I was Lincoln manager. I had a pop at the linesman in the second half over an offside call and gave him a bit of stick. He turned around and told me ‘don’t worry about me mate, your team is rubbish’, only he used a rude word. I had no comeback to that, so I just went and quietly sat back down in my dug-out. As far as this tie goes, you cannot look past Chelsea even though they have had a disappointing dip in form in the Premier League. Enzo Maresca will use his Europa Conference line-up, but they will still be too strong for the Shrimps. He does not have to worry about the linesman giving him stick.”

Today though, Morecambe didn’t just have the linemen to worry about – it was the Referee they had to be wary of. Last season, Thomas Parsons booked himself an all-star part in the TV documentary about the rise and rise of Wrexham FC by putting in perhaps the most one-sided, partial and actually shameful performances I have ever seen from a British referee: he gave them everything they wanted and sent Morecambe player Max Melbourne off for an innocuous challenge into the bargain.

This gentleman was slated to do today’s game but – as we breathed a collective sigh of relief – his replacement Andrew Kitchen turned out to be no better. His performance was also utterly woeful, as we shall see. Chelsea shouldn’t have needed any help to dispose of an impoverished team like Morecambe today – but they got lots and lots of it from the Man in the Middle this afternoon.

It was cold but sunny with little wind as the visitors kicked-off. From the start, the men in the red shirts did exactly what their Manager had predicted they would: kept a good shape; pressed the very strong team in the blue strip and played quite effectively on the break. Chelsea – perhaps a bit complacent or expecting a walk in the park – were sloppy and made a lot of mistakes. But the referee helped them by ignoring the fact that the ball had clearly run out of play on at least two occasions and allowing them to continue; giving them a corner when the last touch clearly came off a Chelsea player and then awarding them free-kicks when the fouls – some of them really quite bad – were obviously committed by the so-called superstars. Maybe he was star-struck himself…

As if this wasn’t bad enough, the Man in the Middle actually awarded them a penalty after just over a quarter of an hour.

It wasn’t one. From where I was watching, the whole of the ball had clearly crossed the goal-line before it hit Morecambe Skipper Yann Songo’o’s arm on the rebound. It was yet another unfathomable decision from a man who clearly really does not know what he is doing.

French international Christopher Nkunku (cost: £52 million) stepped-up to take it against Harry Burgoyne (cost: no fee). But our Harry was equal to it with a simply phenomenal save of truly international quality. Later – after about half an hour – he made another simply sublime reaction stop to keep out £45m Portuguese international João Félix’s strike from close range.

I think all of us in the away end thought that we were heading for a goal-less first half – despite the Referee’s best efforts – until giant Tosin Adarabioyo (weekly salary: c.£120,000) spoilt it with a shot from a long way out which beat Burgoyne only because it took a wicked deflection off one of his own players: the hapless Callum Jones.

But there weren’t millions of pounds of difference between the teams as they returned to the Dressing Rooms at half time. Morecambe had got at Chelsea on several occasions. With just five minutes played, Tollitt showed everyone what he could be with a tremendous turn on the Morecambe right followed by a shot which £20.7 million Filip Jørgensen – who has played internationally for both Denmark and Sweden – made a bit of a meal of. The twin international goalkeeper then dropped a cross from Tollitt after twenty-six minutes and was lucky to see his defenders come to his rescue and clear the danger.

Coach Enzo Maresca clearly wasn’t happy with the way his fabulously rich players had performed during the first period. He sent on Malo Gusto (£37m fee) to replace £30 million Skipper Reece James. Jadon Sancho (subject to a fee of just £25 million if he signs permanently from Manchester United) was sent on in place of £54m Pedro Neto. £53 million Romeo Lavia was also replaced by Malo Gusto (who was an absolute snip at just thirty million pounds). 

King Derek responded with substitutions of his own during the second half. Five players; total cost: zilch.

And it was only in the second half that the utterly absurd discrepancy between the two sides finally showed. Chelsea scored four more goals and won the tie by five goals to nil. Shall we name the scorers? – no; the fees involved in getting them onto the field in the first place are already making my head spin…

But even then, the visitors had chances: substitute Hallam Hope did brilliantly to both anticipate and win a sloppy back-pass only to make a total mess of his shot, which nervy goalkeeper Jørgensen was able to save far too easily with two minutes left. Two minutes earlier, Luke Hendrie had hit a screamer following a corner which went high and wide.

But on another day…

In the seventy-ninth minute – with the home goalkeeper completely out of the picture – only a last-ditch clearance by Axel Disasi stopped late change Harvey Macadam’s header from nestling in the back of the Chelsea goal.

Plus – early on in the second half – Jørgensen had completely misjudged an intended cross from Ben Tollitt which only just missed his far post as he flapped at it and failed to connect as it came in from the Morecambe right. 

But Chelsea finally won the game convincingly.

However, the Morecambe team and the support in the Shed end really did the club proud this afternoon. This may have been a heavy defeat but the effort by the players and the tremendous atmosphere generated by the travelling support was just a joy to be a part of.

To be fair, I’ve lost count of the number of Blues supporters who said good things about our team and the support it attracted as myself and my pals travelled back on the tube to Euston via Victoria. This may have been a defeat on the field today but off it, Morecambe Missionary work could not have been more effective and – for what it’s worth, as I wipe away a genuine tear – I feel really proud tonight to be a supporter of Derek Adams’ team and particularly to be one of the people who have followed it through thick and thin; some of us for decades. This could be the end of an era thanks to the machinations of a succession of dodgy owners by a club adored by fans these creatures clearly don’t give a damn about. But days like this will never be forgotten by all of us who were lucky enough to be there.

This is what the great man himself said afterwards:

“I thought we started the game really well. We created some really good opportunities in the first half. We could have scored – there were some really good opportunities in the eighteen-yard box. We closed the space exceptionally well. We didn’t make it easy for them – they’re a talented squad. We did well on the day. I thought that throughout, the team – their organisation; their shape; their understanding of the game – was very good. I can only say thank you because (the Morecambe fans) were great throughout the ninety minutes. They were standing on their feet, supporting and singing. The players took a lot from that – and me and the staff.”

Chelsea: 12 Filip Jørgensen; 2 Axel Disasi; 4 Tosin Adarabioyo: 7 Pedro Neto (19 Jadon Sancho 45’); 14 João Félix; 18 Christopher Nkunku; 24 Reece James (C) (27 Malo Gusto 45’); 32 Tyrique George; 40 Renato Viega 45 Romeo Lavia (3 Marc Cucurella 25’).

Subs not used: 1 Robert Sanchez; 6 Levi Colwill; 8 Enzo. Fernández; 15 Nicolas Jackson; 20 Carl Palmer; 34 Josh Acheampong.

Morecambe:  1 Harry Burgoyne; 2 Luke Hendrie; 4 Tom White; 6 Jamie Stott; 7 Gwion Edwards (3 Adam Lewis 67’); 14 Rhys Williams; 18 Ben Tollitt (8 Harvey Macadam 80’); 19 Marcus Dackers (11 Jordan Slew 52’); 23 David Tutonda; 24 Yann Songo’o (C) (5 Max Taylor 80’); 28 Callum Jones (9 Hallam Hope 80’).

Subs not used: 21 Alfie Scales; 10 Lee Angol; 17 Paul Lewis; 26 Lennon Dobson.

Ref: Andrew Kitchen.

Att: 38,998 (over 3000 from Morecambe.)