ENTERPRISE NATIONAL LEAGUE. TUESDAY, 7th OCTOBER 2025.

Scunny Bunny Gets the Honey – Not Funny…

This is what I wrote about Scunthorpe United in my review of National League clubs prior to the season:

Scunthorpe’s Glanford Park ground can be found 137 miles from the Mazuma Mobile Stadium in Lincolnshire’s third biggest town.

There was a time when Scunny stole our best footballers because they were a bigger club than we were: Garry Thompson and Mark Duffy were both players we could ill afford to lose at the time they departed for Lincolnshire. But since then, the boot has moved to the other foot – at least until Morecambe’s relegation from the EFL last season.

I have a theory – not very original, admittedly – that football teams often mirror the fortunes of the towns that spawned them. Scunthorpe was once a relatively prosperous place, the fortunes of its over 80,000 inhabitants based on the iron works which once abounded in the town. But now, only one steel mill remains – thanks to nationalisation by the current Labour government – and Scunny has fallen on hard times and is subject to many serious social problems.

It is also clearly a hot bed for crime. Doubt it? Then listen to It’s a Fair Cop on Radio 4 and get ex-copper Alfie Moore’s take on the place (it’s genuinely hilarious):

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/brand/b060fj66

In truth, crime in Scunny is 140% the national average, which is quite alarming.

So is this `The Scunthorpe Problem’?

No it isn’t. `The Scunthorpe Problem’ is one of the unintended consequences of Artificial Intelligence (A.I.) and other internet scanners which seek to clean-up the world wide web by identifying bad, unacceptable or rude words on it – and removing them.

In doing this though, they created The Scunthorpe Problem because they can delete all sorts of seemingly innocuous terms because these seemingly innocent words can sometimes actually hide other rude or even downright crude words which some very Woke, stupid or perhaps religious people might find distasteful or even offensive.

So if you’re planning to look at the healing properties of wild mushrooms and hear that shitake growing near scrap metal can be analysed next Saturday in Scunthorpe, be very careful: A.I. could render this sentence literally incomprehensible by removing five key words from it.

But back to the football club. Scunthorpe’s real problem is that they have never been able to replicate the success they briefly enjoyed when Physio-turned-Coach Nigel Adkins took over the management of the team in 2006 (and – come to think of it – neither has he…)

But we get ahead of ourselves…

The Iron played at The Old Show Ground from 1899 (when the club was founded) until 1988. Then – with spooky echoes of the Morecambe experience – they sold the site to Sainsbury Supermarkets and built a new arena at Glanford Park, almost two miles to the west of their former home. And then – just like us – their problems came home to roost when ownership disputes eventually just about wrecked the club.

Scunny began life as members of the Midlands League but had to wait until 1950 to be elected into the Football League’s Third Division North. They won this in 1958 but gradually slipped from the Second Division (in 1964) back through the Third into the lowest tier of the EFL at the time – the Fourth Division – during 1968. Not a lot happened as the club stayed in the two lower tiers for decades after this point until Magic Man Adkins put down his sponge and took over the Manager’s reins in 2006.

He guided United – courtesy partly of a sixteen-match unbeaten run – to win League One with an extraordinary 91 points. But they only lasted one season in the Championship. A year later, though – in 2009 – they were back. The 2008-9 season was a momentous one for the Iron. They reached the EFL Trophy Final at Wembley only to be beaten after extra time; 3-2 by Luton Town. But they were back under the giant arch again at the end of the campaign and beat Millwall 3-2 in the League One Play-Off Final to secure a place in the Championship once more. But Adkins departed for Pastures New at Southampton and the club’s slow but steady demise started to develop from then on. They found themselves in League Two again in 2013 and – despite another stint in League One from 2014 until 2019, slipped back down a Division before falling out of the EFL altogether during 2022.

As a warning to the unwary, they weren’t good enough for National League football either and were immediately relegated to National League North for two seasons. Just a few weeks ago, they won their place in the National League back again by winning the National League North Play-Offs, 2-1 versus Chester City.

Scunny’s problems off the field have been – in their own way – as tortuous as Morecambe’s own in recent times. Unreliable and/or unscrupulous ‘businessmen’ have claimed ownership of the new stadium; threatened to lock the team out of it; demanded an utterly bizarre seven pence a year (sic.) rental; called other people `liars’ in very public slanging matches; described the football team as `Squatters’ and `Trespassers’ and basically used the club as a Cash Cow and a stick with which to beat other people in a way that is far too familiar to Shrimps’ supporters. These disputes seem to have been settled, however and the club appears to have been stable – at least off the field – for the last couple of years. Let’s hope it stays like that – and that ours enjoys a similarly positive outcome – eventually…

I was surprised to see that Morecambe have only played Scunny six times altogether in all competitions: I thought it was more. I was further dismayed to see that the Shrimps have only won one of these games but the Iron have been victorious on three occasions.

But then I remembered…

Against Scunthorpe United, Morecambe have historically nearly always seemed to have failed to turn-up – particularly away from home.

As well as Thommo and Mark Duffy; Alex Kenyon and a couple of others have played for both clubs.

Morecambe were initially scheduled to travel to Lincolnshire to play Scunthorpe on Tuesday, 19th August 2025. Because of the crisis at the club, this fixture had to be cancelled. It has been re-arranged for Tuesday, 7th October 2025 and will start at 1945hrs. The home fixture will be completed on Saturday, 17th January 2026.

The original fixture on 7th October wasn’t played because of the likely extinction of our club at the time – a fate from which we have been rescued by Panjab Warriors – and for which all Morecambe fans will be eternally grateful. The rookie Manager who was installed as part of the deal – Ashvir Singh Johal – has not had an easy start to his first job as the boss of a relatively big club. He rightly talks of his players having had no pre-season and the shortage of training sessions to get his ideas over to his hastily-assembled group of new – and mostly very promising – players. And the club’s form – disastrous at times recently – has reflected this. Last Saturday, though, they played well and deservedly drew at high-flying Tamworth, one goal each.

At the same time, even higher-flying Scunny were losing at home to Carlisle United, 0-1. They had Skipper Andrew Boyce sent-off before half time and were apparently lucky to end the game with ten men after Will Evans appeared to use his elbow on a Blues’ player in first-half stoppage time. The defeat was the first one of the season for United and the 25 points they have accumulated after twelve matches has placed them comfortably in the Play-Off positions in the National League in fifth place. So – given Morecambe’s lowly position right at the bottom of the table coupled with their utterly dire history as far as the Iron is concerned –the Shrimps could be in a for a torrid time this evening. As we have seen, in six previous meetings in all competitions, Morecambe have only been victorious once (a 4-1 home win in Scunny’s farewell season to the EFL) and have lost three of them. They have never won at Glanford Park either.

But in the absence of the Iron’s Skipper – well – who knows what might happen?

Morecambe’s Captain tonight was Gwion Edwards as club Skipper Yann Songo’o was relegated to the bench after clearly pulling or stretching something he shouldn’t have last Saturday. Constant threat to Tamworth all afternoon last time out – Jack Nolan – was not named in the starting line-up either for whatever reason. Instead, George Thomas started for the Shrimps for the very first time, giving the visitors’ wings – right and left – a very Welsh feel.

Manager Andy Butler had to shuffle his squad following the loss of his Captain. Callum Roberts was given this task tonight and Joe Rowley and Danny Whitehall were promoted to the starting eleven and the boss chose to start without a reserve goalkeeper.

It was dry as Scunny kicked-off under the lights. Both sides played quick football on the deck right from the start of the game. But Morecambe had the first really good chance of the contest. Goalkeeper Archie Mair kicked the ball long; Gwion Edwards took it down on the Shrimps’ left, went past Danny Whitehall as if he wasn’t there and played a killer low ball into the centre. If Rolando Aarons had been truly committed and prepared to slide in, he would almost certainly have scored. But he didn’t and a golden chance was wasted. Gwion was in on goal again just two minutes later but his shot was wild and went way over the bar. Archie was yet again almost caught in possession dawdling on the ball after eighteen minutes but almost immediately did well to push a cross from the United right away into No Man’s Land. Callum Roberts then took a shot for the hosts which was deflected for a corner with 25 minutes on the clock. Half an hour’s play saw Morecambe again progressing well this time up the Scunny left – with the impressive Lewis Payne central to the move. As the home crowd became increasingly frustrated, Edwards again received a long pass from Mair and instantly tried to lob Rory Watson in the home goal. But the man in the green kit just managed to get his fingertips to it. Out of nothing, Oliver Ewing then hit the post for Scunthorpe after 36 minutes with the away goalkeeper beaten. But – against the run of play – the hosts took the lead after 39 minutes as a quick passing move from their goalkeeper to the left and then across the field via a slight touch in the middle to the right found Roberts on the wing and bearing down on goal. He unleashed a superb side-footed shot from the angle which swerved round Mair to his right and nestled low into the net. Two minutes later, it got even worse for the visitors. Elijah Dixon-Bonner was booked for a needless foul on the edge of the away penalty area on the Scunny left. Danny Whitehall took the resulting free-kick, swerved the ball over the three-man Morecambe wall and beat Archie all ends up as he desperately dived to his right.

So that was basically it: in two minutes of poor concentration, the game was lost.

Morecambe pulled a goal back in the second half when really good approach play led to Jake Cain playing a low cross in from the left for Ben Tollitt to sweep the ball home. But any thoughts of a come-back evaporated as the visitors failed to create any momentum and substitute Tyrell Sellars-Fleming scored far too easily for United from an innocuous-looking thrown-in on the Scunny left with a weak-ish shot which you suspect the Morecambe goalkeeper should have saved as it trundled slowly past him on the ground to his right.

There were further chances for both sides but the Iron saw the match out without any real fear of a recovery from the visitors.

I thought Morecambe was the better side for most of the first half but they squandered their chances; ran out of steam and looked leggy and unfit yet again in the second half. Archie Mair – bawled-out by his Skipper in front of his own fans last Saturday – looked shaky again and every time the ball was at his feel, my heart at least was in my mouth. He makes too many basic errors and he was penalised by Referee James Oldham after 53 minutes for holding onto the ball for too long: Scunny were awarded a corner which fortunately came to nothing.

At the end of the evening, it was all too easy for United after an early scare and they went up to fifth position in the National League as a result.

Morecambe remain bottom; a potentially vital game-in-hand on all other strugglers now lost. This wasn’t a relegation performance tonight, though: the team played some nice football at times. But too many players – Rolando Aarons most notably but also substitute Harrison Panayiotou for example – didn’t put in a shift whilst others such as Miguel Azeez played poorly and George Thomas was totally anonymous. No team can carry this number of passengers and expect to win.

It will be interesting to see what happens in Morecambe’s next game against a supposedly inferior side in the shape of Chester City next Saturday at the Maz. This could prove to be a truly Acid Test about how far the Shrimps have actually come so far this season…

This is what Ash had to say about tonight’s latest loss:

“Firstly, we lost – we should have won.  So it’s bitterly disappointing to lose. We made a good game. We’ve made a lot of big adjustments – like, big adjustments – in the way we defend. With the ball, we should have scored. We had maybe ten or eleven clear-cut chances. We’re going to get there. When it clicks, we’re going to have a team. I’m very confident that we’re not going to be in the position we’re in (currently) in a few weeks’ time. We’ve got to make it click. Of the three goals we conceded, we shouldn’t have conceded maybe two of those. We’re on the right track – we’re only a few weeks away from it clicking.”

Perhaps more tellingly, this is the remarkably honest assessment that victorious Manager Andy Butler made of what had happened after the game:

“I thought Morecambe were an excellent side in possession. I said that in my pre-match meeting to the players: “Don’t get fooled by their position. They will get it right and they will score a lot of goals.” I said at half time to the players: “This isn’t over”. And fair play to Morecambe – they do deal with the ball well and that’s because they work hard. It will come good for them, no doubt about that – one team’s going to get a hiding from them.”

Scunthorpe United: 31 Rory Watson; 4 Jéan Belehouan (Y); 5 Will Evans; 7 Declan Howe (16 Tyrell Sellars-Fleming 71’); 8 Alfie Beestin (20 Kian Scales 64’); 9 Danny Whitehall (22 Joey Dawson 79’); 10 Callum Roberts (C); 11 Joe Rowley; 17 Oliver Ewing (25 Zain Westbrooke 63’); 21 Joe Starbuck; 33 Tyler Denton (3 Branden Horton 71’).

Subs not used:  14 Carlton Obinna Ubaezuonu; 23 Billy Chadwick.

Morecambe: 1 Archie Mair; 2 Lewis Payne (Y); 5 Maldini Calcurri; 6 Ludwig Francillette; 7 Gwion Edwards (C); 8 Miguel Azeez; 10 Jake Cain (Y); 12 Rolando Aarons (33 Arjan Raikhy 72’); 18 Ben Tollitt (9 Harrison Panayiotou 83’); 29 Elijah Dixon-Bonner (Y) (24 Yann Songo’o 59’); 32 George Thomas (28 Emmerson Sutton 72’).

Subs not used: 35 Harry Ascroft; 14 Alie Sesay; 36 Jack Nolan.

Ref: James Oldham.

Att: 4,126 (66 from Morecambe – well done all of you; it’s a long way and on a Tuesday night, if you went by train, you won’t be back until breakfast time tomorrow…)